Friends are like Flowers, and it is Springtime!
March 24, 2010 § Leave a comment
I have the most amazing friends I could ask for. And of all of the mess that has come out of Cody’s death, the good thing is that I have found that my friends are truer than I thought they were. In fact, right before Cody died, I remember feeling lonely here in Waco and I remember being a little frustrated with my friends. Part of any disconnect I felt was my fault. Living in Waco, planning a wedding, and attending law school boot camp (as I refer to Baylor. Hey, they call it the “one, two punch” so I’m not so far off base here!), had pretty much consumed my life and I had let people drift away in the process of life’s nonsense. In the past few months, I’ve learned that my friendships are important and that my friends are more than I ever thought they were. They have stood by me, listened to my stories, cried with me, laughed with me when all I needed was to smile, listened to me when I asked people to stop treating me like a leper, and so much more. I don’t think I could ever thank them enough. In fact, some of the people who are most important in my life now, were not the ones who I would’ve expected to be in that position. I’ve realized that we never really who some of our best friends are until we need them or something happens. Its sad really. But, now, as my life begins to establish its new normal, its on me again to make sure I don’t let those friendships go astray. I know my friends try, but I have to try too. Its the duel effort that makes friendships feel effortless; the true friends are the ones with whom conversations flow, make you feel at home when you’re with them, brighten your soul with their understanding of you and acceptance dispite your fault. I read a quote that says “You like someone because. You love someone although.” True friendships are love relationships. Trust me, I tell my friends that I love them often and I mean it! Our friendships develop “because” someone is funny, “because” someone has something in common with us, “because” someone has a good bonding conversation with us. But, its when things get further along, when we see each others faults, when we move and have to keep in touch dispite the friendship being less convenient than it was when we were close, when we have to forgive, support, lift up, call out on any b.s., that true love friendships develop. “Although” we both see each other’s faults, we chose to continue friendships. Love is a choice for any kind of relationship, not just a feeling. Its a choice we must constantly make. I have made the choice to love my friends. And I hope that they feel loved by me in return.
This past weekend, I went to Austin for SXSW. I got to see amazing bands, eat great food, and do a little shopping. But, the best part of the weekend was getting to spend it with some of my best friends. At one point, someone asked (oh, and by someone, I mean the tour manager for one of my FAVORITE bands because we were hanging out with them…just sayin’…), who all of my friends were and how I knew them. I had to explain that one was a college friend that I got closer to after college, one was a friend from childhood, another was both a hometown and college friend, but from seperate groups than the others, one was my sister, and the other was her friend, who has become mine as well. It wasn’t until he asked that I realized we were kind of a random group! On the way back to Waco, I was talking to my mom about it (one of my very very best friends!!!), and we both noted that my best friends tend to be the kind of people that can get along with almost anyone. I honestly feel like they are the most loving, accepting, easy-going, understanding people in the world. And the brilliance of these personalities is that I can get any of them together and they can not only get along, but can become friends with each other and we can have a great time doing absolutely nothing. That is such a special treat that so many people don’t get to have in their lives. I thank God for my friends daily.
“Joy come to those who in a sense forget themselves and become totally aware fo the other” -Mother Theresa